As I move back into life here, taking in my surroundings and catching up on what I’ve missed, the paths that lead to safety and those to the mire of overextension are obvious. Upon entering the third trimester of service one must think about what can reasonably be concluded, or risk broken promises and more than a fair share of guilt (what is a reasonable amount of guilt remains for another discussion). My eyes, in general, are bigger than my stomach; the challenge has always been to not overreach. Usually I’ve been able to manage pretty well – this, however, is a completely different situation even after 18 months! The measure of what can or cannot be done is very different while volunteering. It is too easy to see and hear all that needs to be done and develop all sorts of plans. So much depends upon the people with whom you work, the place in which you work, and the things that are needed – some are easily implemented in one place while difficult in another. Given ample time most things are possible; at this point, time slips by like a river in flood: quickly at a high volume.

I feel fairly confident that the completion of our main project, namely the construction of two rainwater catchment tanks, is an attainable goal. This is a very good place to be after facing so much uncertainty. Part of this newfound certitude rests upon trust, and not numbers; I have discovered that sometimes this is the only option for forward movement (though not necessarily acceptable in all cases). This week will see the final draft of the grant proposal, the tying up of some loose ends, and shipping the mess off to the funding agency. That there are groups willing to give of their excess to those with a deficiency is extremely helpful.

The thought that so little money can accomplish so much outside of the States raises difficult questions as to Why? Why and How? In discovering the manner by which money can circulate throughout the world, and how wealth is often acquired by those-who-need-least from those-who-need-most, I find myself considering how to manage my own (or at the moment, what passes through my hands). That the acquisition of money is not the key to a fulfilled life should be an obvious truth, though contrary to our consumer ethos - other things are much more valuable. That money does grease the wheels, and that those who find themselves without are often locked in dire straits cannot be, nor should be denied. But these are not reasons to follow our American hubris of “more is always better.” Along with wealth comes the responsibility to use or invest it wisely. What better investment can there be than the betterment of humanity? To find ways to extend the fortune we have been afforded in a personally comfortable way to others? I hope that wherever I live, with whatever wealth I am gifted, I will find ways to share it as well as possible. Thankfully there are many worthy organizations, missions, and projects that can facilitate this basic effort (and those that don’t – check before you give!). The effort of turning wealth, over and above what is needed for the individual and family to live reasonably, into opportunity and compassion for those without. Americans are, by most measures, a charitable people. I think we can and must do more.

I recently finished reading Build Your Own Earth Oven by Kiko Denzen. Note the imperitive nature of the title. My plan is to do just that (this seems a reasonable undertaking), and further to explore the possibility of building permanent structures with cob (a clay, sand, and straw mixture) and other less invasive/extractive materials. These options are increasingly attractive, especially when the negative effects of overused resources upon the land are so glaringly obvious. See above: living reasonably. There are a lot of us here. Managing our consumption wisely, on an individual level, is quickly becoming a moral imperative. I imagine that before too long there choice to conserve or not will no longer be available.

As an addendum to the previous paragraph: wise usage does not mean no usage. It means just what it says, wise usage. Wisdom in this area is something of which we are in short popular supply.

Here we are, an entire month gone by and not a single entry! Sigh. Good intentions often fall to the wayside when confronted with a busy schedule; this month in America being no exception. Despite the schedule, overtired body, and unrealized visits, it has been wonderful. Bittersweet in some ways yes, but this sentiment was not unexpected. And tomorrow, the return.

Flying into the Pacific Northwest felt so good. Rainer, the Olympics, the Sound. It was almost more of a homecoming than actually being in Wisconsin. Don't get me wrong, the Midwest will always be "home", but this place calls me in a way that cornfields and bratwurst cannot. The fact that I know a crazy Dutchman down the road who is always willing to sell me bratwurst has no bearing on this feeling whatsoever. Cousins Sue and Roy were happy to house me for the duration of my stay, despite its intermittent nature, which was greatly appreciated. Hopefully they felt less like chauffeurs than they appeared to be. Four round trips to the airport – I will return the favor someday.

The highlight of being here on the Peninsula was, certainly, seeing Kari Ann. Just like her time in the Philippines all those months ago solidified our standing together, observing her at Camp Seymour, around town, here, has provided memories and a perspective that could not be obtained otherwise. I know now what Glen Cove looks like, where she stays, the shops she likes, et cetera. Distance in a relationship is hard but is made much more manageable by connections, however brief, that create common ground and understanding - this month has been marked by such important connections. I cannot express how thankful I am for these opportunities. What is left to do but smile?

And then it happened. The great Midwest. The effects of distance upon relationships is not relegated to the romantic realm. Purely platonic friendships suffer in similar ways. Reconnection is needed to maintain their health too. It was special to take part in Mike and Leah's wedding and to see all I did in the greater Kenosha area. There was not enough time to do everything, but I am satisfied with what occurred. The sameness of Kenosha in my absence was not surprising as much as comforting. What an important humbling experience, to discover that life goes on without you!

I also had a nice visit with Kari Ann's folks in McHenry. This seems to mark a significant point in our relationship (though Kari passed this mark last Christmas) that two sets of family are accessible, acknowledged, and welcomed. When Kari Ann visited my folks over Christmas of last year made me to feel present, even in absentia. Her solo visit made the holiday season much easier to bear than it would have been otherwise. I think that Ms. Weichle felt something of that this July, and I’m happy to have been. It's a good feeling. Yeah!

Then it was up to Holcombe, WI. My parents had moved from my childhood home just before I left 18 months ago – and the lake house is nice. It is a good thing that they should have a place uniquely theirs. I've worked hard to keep from storing much of mine there (aside from the guitars which would suffer needlessly in storage elsewhere) and not infringe upon their space; I feel largely successful in this. Kari Ann spent a few days on the lake (thank you again Grandma Pieper!) and we attended the wedding of my cousin Sonja. While at my parents I did quite a bit of baking, cookies, granola, bread, to the consternation of those required to eat the results. The complaint, hopefully, had more to do with the heat than my culinary skills.

On the flight out of Minneapolis my mom and sister cried only a little. Saying goodbye has been much easier this time around, at least for me – there are not so many unknowns. (These are not the unknown unknowns of Rumsfeldian lore.) Even so when I talked to the folks on the phone just before beginning this I cried; but only a little! (Not to negate the emotional import of these most recent tears, but, I also cried during the third Matrix installment when Neo was blinded forcing Trinity to fly the ship…anyway.)

Oh dear. I just realized that not once during the two weeks spent in the Midwest did a cheese curd pass my lips. For this offence I'm sure that excommunication from the cheesehead church is in order...forgive me! I sin out of ignorance and not intent! How strange – apparently cheese no longer runs through my veins.

And the culmination of America time finds me once again in the Northwest. How appropriate is this exit – it’s meant to be. We flew from Seattle on the original trip to the Philippines, and again I leave from here. To the uncertainties and challenges of my Philippine existence do I return. This time though, it’s different. I stand renewed, hopefully a bit wiser, and with momentum. Thanks to all who made time and space for me on this run; it meant the world. I look forward to sharing time together again. Adios.